My name is Onome. My parents enrolled me in a boarding school as a means to curtail my stubborn excesses. Their core reason was to give me the best of the best of education. But I know that deep down; they wanted to get rid of me from the house. I was much trouble to them. Sometimes I wonder if sending me off to a boarding school was really the solution to my excesses.
So here is my concern. I always get into a series of arguments with my mother whenever I remind her of my displeasure in her not showing up during visiting days in school.
Okay, here is the deal. I am not an ungrateful child. I appreciate the sacrifices my parents make for me to be comfortable in school. My mother sends gifts and provisions and ensures I lack nothing. But she doesn’t show up during visiting days and that’s where we always have issues. I feel sad when I see other parents turning up for their children but mine don’t.
Truth be told, my mum doesn’t seem to give me an ideal reason for not visiting other than the fact that I don’t give her reasons to visit. That’s all I can deduce from her statement. Yea, she may add the line that she’s super busy with work but what parent should be too busy as not to make out time to be there when their children need them most? She comes to visit but it is not always the case.
I agree that I could be a pain in her neck some of the time but it shouldn’t stop her from doing the needful. My dad is barely around so I don’t really expect him to turn up. And when he is around, he doesn’t show up. The thing is that we are not on good terms some of the time so he doesn’t come to visit. Yea, I know parenting is supposed to be a joint effort but I think one has to make do when the other is not around. But he provides most of the things I need to be comfortable. They both do.
But, that’s not enough for me. I need their attention and availability too. I need them to be around during visiting days. This means a lot to me and I don’t know how else to pass the message across to them. I am taking time to really express how I feel about the whole matter because it gets to me. But my parents do not see it that way. They don’t see any rationale behind my anger towards their attitude. Whenever the issue is brought up, it always ends in an argument.
If you ask me, parenting goes beyond making adequate provisions; even though the provisions are part of the package.
I know you might say there are tons of teens out there who are praying to be in my shoes in that I have access to the basic things of life. The truth is that I know there are such teens out there. But, I just want my parents to be available on visitation day.
Is this too much to ask? I’m I demanding for too much?
This doesn’t mean that I am an ungrateful child right?
Should I stay content with the things I am provided with and forget about the issue of visitation?
Please tell me what to do?
Signed; Concerns of a troubled teen.
Hi there, My name is Faith Ijeoma Ezenwere. I am a Broadcast Journalist/OAP and a teen coach. I am passionate about building a community of impact driven Teens and young adults in all spheres of life. In simple terms, I help Teens/Young adults live their dreams. Welcome to my World!